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Everytime I get pissed and feel that I just want everything to stop, I talk to you, and after a while, I love you all over again. What is this about? I don't get it. Why do I hate and love you at the same time? It's like a double edged sword. It hurts but it still feels good. I seriously don't get it. How is it possible that I love you and hate you at the same time?

Insignificance

You know, i don't even know whether i spelled the title correctly but who gives a damn eh? I totally forget how insignificant i am to other people's lives sometimes. I'll be sitting next to one of my friends yapping on and on about professional wrestling and stuff and he'll just be responding with a series of nods and maybe a forced smile here and there. And Suddenly I stop and I try to read the guy's mind. And basically it'll be like, " God please make this guy stop talking and i will build several churches in your honor." And so I just stop and say "Excuse me, I have to go." The guy's next reaction will probably be a sigh of relief. Then I go into a corner and think. "Man am I always boring people like this." Well, the answer is most definitely yes. That's because no one, and i mean no one except that divine being that they call your soul mate will be interested in your thoughts or your feelings. Unless you go up to someone and say. Hey, I'm depressed. They'd never ask "how are you?" and mean it. It's a bunch of baloney i tell you. Like right now, I'm feeling like a sack of 10 cent manure but no one notices. Or bothers to, or wants to. Geez, are we all like little blind specks on the earth who don't give a damn about each other? Thats crazytalk. I find it so depressing and so frickin sad that no one will ever see the world the same way that i see it through my eyes. I wish that there could be someone that similar and deep to be able to appreciate the same things that I do but to tell you the truth, that person is a myth, a folk tale and a fictitious character. I recently found out why i am so unlike any other within my group of friends. It is because I have an unbeleivable dream. People like Selvam have a marked goal which is highly achievable. In his case, to be a lawyer. And in the case of my friend Damian, he wants to be part of the military. A commando. Those are down to earth goals man. You tell them to someone and they'd say "Hey that's great! Do your best to achieve it!" But now if Kyle comes along one fine day, "I'm planning to become a professional wrestler." " HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
"No seriously, whats your ambition?"

Geez. Am I really leaping for a dream that is in the densest of the blue sky above. Everyone relates to each other so well! Selvam, Jasvir, Dewei, Marc, who else? Wait what do I mean who else? EVERYBODY else. But what about me? People call it being unique. Well, I am sick to death of being unique. Because being unique is equivalent to being lonely. Name me one person in Singapore who's ambitions, instead of progressing into more down to earth things, become even more and more crazy. When I was 6 I wanted to be a vet. At 12, a writer. At 15, a singer and now at 16, A singer/writer/Professional Wrestler/ Actor/ Director. However scary it may be, whatever it is, I am not going to settle for a mundane life. I'm not going to a stuffy office at 7 in the morning, work till 9 at night, come home to a damn one room flat and sleep. I'll be damned if I'm going to turn out that way. I'm going to travel the globe and have fun while working damn it! I'm going to do all the stuff i dreamt of. I'm going to disneyland with my peeps! That's right Damian i haven't forgotten our pact. I'm going to throw a paper airplane into the grand canyon and I'm going to spit off the hoover dam. I'm not going to be confined in an office. 4 walls cannot hold my hype. I'm going places! I know i'll never find someone who can actually fill up the empty spaces within. But if I'm going to have to do this alone, then i'll do it alone. You are welcome to join me anytime. Thats if you're ready to release your hold on security and stability and take a walk on uncertainty and fear. Beleive me the latter is the road to a higher glory than you can ever imagine. But if you want to take it safe and live "happily ever after" Go ahead. Because that fairy tale will be a repetitive and boring one. Mine has just begun. And the first few pages have already been written. Time for me to write on. Fairy tales can come true. Its up to you to see whether it does for you.


Forget about love for now. It'll only bring you pain and suffering.
Forget about relationships for now, they never last. Some end before they begin.
Forget your emotions for now, they lead to the previous two things i told you to forget.
Forget about being heard. No one wants to hear your thoughts.
- A quote from my brother Kurt Ganapathy
(I know it sounds bad, but my brother took a metaphorical bullet for me today and I gotta honor his deed)







It's sad to know that your green eyes and blond hair are but figments of my imagination.
Your touch, just a dream.
Your kiss but a lost thought.
Your smile, an illusion.
Yourself, a mirage.
Your love, just a myth.....It's so sad.
Is it wrong to love a fairytale?
Is it a sin to long for you?

- Kyle Ganapathy (Youngbloods excerpt from "Her existence no longer exists")

Blacksmith

Kyle walks into the blacksmith's workshop. In there was the familiar sound of metal on metal. Marty, the blacksmith was on shift that day and Kyle walked up to the front desk to greet him.

Kyle: Hello Marty. How's business?

Marty: Oh hello Kyle! Well you know, slow money at this time of year.

Kyle: I see. Well you're in luck today.

Kyle hands Marty a small red object that seems to have cracks along its sides.

Marty: Another damaged heart eh?

Kyle: Yeah i've been meaning to fix it for a while now but I wasn't in the neighbourhood if you know what i mean.

Marty: (Takes the object) Hmm...what's this, the fourth one you've had? You know you should get one of those titanium alloy ones. They're unbreakable.

Kyle: Yeah but they're as cold as ice. Not to mention heavy.

Marty: I agree with you on that. The people I know who had titanium hearts either died a lonely death or just became a body without a soul. But then again, this real heart has its downsides too.

Kyle looks at the tattered object in Marty's hand and takes it from him. He closely examines it. Each scar and crack both weathered and fresh made it look like a torn up old rag.

Kyle: Well, in this state, if it's still good, it probably can take in alot more. So why don't you tune it up a little? And I'll be back on my feet in no time.

Marty: Alright then. But running on this thing can take a toll on your body now and then. It's been through quite a bit. Not alot but quite a bit.

Kyle: Well, don't worry about me Marty. Remember that time when I got my first crack (points to a prominent scar) and you told me "Whatever doesn't kill you will only make you a stronger person" ?

Marty smiled at Kyle as he said those words. He took the heart from Kyle and placed it safely in the front pocket of his workshop apron.

Marty: You have learnt well from me. (Takes out a ghastly looking object that was similar to Kyle's. Only alot more damaged) This old thing has kept me going for years. Hasn't let up on me yet. You'll be fine. (Laughs)

Kyle: (smiles) Yeah. Hahah. Well thanks Marty. Have it done by Friday?

Marty: Sure thing Kyle. You take care now!

Kyle walked out of the workshop and into the shade of the oak trees outside. It was a long way back to the river where his raft was hitched. But a beautiful and pleasant walk it was.

F*ck you love

Why? Why does it always end up like this? Me. Alone. Darkness. Depression. Just when I thought I was getting better, it tumbles back down once again. Why? Why does is hurt just as much as it did before? Why does my heart ache everytime you* don't say a simple "Hi"? Why do i feel terrible everytime I spend a day without talking to you*? Why has it come to this when it started out like a dream? All good things come to an end. But why so soon??

I know why... This is all your fault! Yes I'm talking to you! There! Standing in the back of my heart. Love! Why have you done this to me again? Haven't you hurt me just about enough? When I was 4. Remember that? When I was 12? Last year? This year!? What is this damn grudge you have against me? Haven't you spilled enough of my blood by now? Everytime, it begins with a gentle touch, a little promise maybe even a hug. But it all ends up the same. Your dagger through my heart. Why do you torture me so, Love? Am I going to have to eliminate you totally from my life before this ends? Everytime I take your hand, you twist me and you bend me like a twig in between your fingers. Is this how you treat me when you are supposed to be one of Life's most beautiful things? I've had enough of you! Why can't you support me like faith and hope do? You're like a lethal drug. It seems good at first but then you die. Is death the price i have to pay for you to stop this? No...I'm not going to let something that you created drive me to death. Do you know how much pain you've put me through? Why? Why did you make me do this? I'm up to here with your false hopes! You know what? Forget you! Until you stop being a pain in the chest, you can piss off from my hall of emotions. Go now! I know you'll be back and I know we'll have this conversation once more. I know I'll take your hand again and dance a treacherous dance with you. But until then, I hope you can see this finger of mine in the air. No it's not the head of a dove, it simply means F*ck you Love.


-Kyle

To my peeps i still love you guys. But not in that way. -Shudders. That department is handled by Friendship. Heh. Take care.

I'm up to here with sushi

Okay. I'm a little woozy from eating 13 plates of sushi this afternoon so i can't bring myself to write another Youngbloods snippet. But it'll be back soon. Man, what a day. Usually the time from when I wake up to the time the bell rings at the end of the school day is a big empty space which is not worthy of being blogged about. Except maybe that the chair I was sitting on broke and I fell off. Twas a pretty funny sight really. I sat on the floor for about 10 seconds thinking "what the hell?" Well, after the rest of the boring lessons, we went out to Parkway parade. Shane, Josh, Samuel and I. And we went for a sushi buffet! All you can eat for just $13.90. You should've been there. We had alot of fun. Josh started by saying, "I'm gonna eat like 20 plates man!" Well it was pretty short lived coz we all shorted out after the 10th plate. Maybe not Shane though. Josh and I were so full by the end that it was like being under the influence of alcohol or something. It hurt even to laugh man. And when you sit next to Joshua, its hard not to laugh. Thank God we didn't throw up right there and then. I think sushi is alot like pancakes. It's wonderful at the beginning but towards the end you just get plain sick of em. Ugh. We had to help each other walk up the stairs. Oh and Josh pushed me into a bush of these plants that had these spines on them outside Parkway. I put my hands out to stop me from falling and i guess i didn't realise it was that sharp until i pulled out my hands which were scratched with skin coming off! Shane left to go hoime but since we left our bags in class, we went back to school. We took the high road on bus 15. I saw Nadia and Michelle at the bus stop but it was too crowded to say hi. And they wouldn't have noticed anyway so yeahh. Haha. Okay by then it was hard to stand because of all the extra weight, so josh and I sat on a patch of grass beside the road and gazed at the sky. Actually the view over there is kinda nice. Though we may have been sitting in a place where dogs like to leave their mark. So then we went back into school and played a bit of soccer. It was fun. heheh. And I guess that's pretty much everything that was interesting that happened today. No really I'm not kidding. So right now, I'm sitting here and typing the full stop at the end of this sentence. Oh well, Samuel just sent me his story so i'm gonna go read it now. Not like you would care you stupid post applet. Pfft. Alrighty take care and have a nice day.


-Kyle

End of Days

....Samuel, Kyle and Joshua stood back to back in the vast expanse of dust and sand. On the ground lay the bodiless suits of armor which they had just brought down. Slowly, they too disintergrated and were blown away to become one with the sandy ground.

Samuel: Well that takes care of those things.

Kyle: What the heck were they anyway?

Joshua: Possesed suits of armor or something.

Kyle moved a few steps forward and prodded the black helmet with the blade of his basket hilt broadsword. Upon touch, it shattered into many tiny shards. They slipped off the blade like dewdrops off a waxy leaf. It was nothing like what he had ever seen before. He shook his head and looked up. All around them was a big sandstorm. Visibility was negligible beyond the small circle which they stood in.

Joshua: Now what? How the heck are we going to get back Samuel?

Samuel: We've called the Guardians already. They should've been here before we even fought those damn things.

Kyle: I don't even think they can find us in this storm right now. Look. (Cuts the air several times with his sword) See these scratches?

He held up his sword and the previously shiny blade was now covered with unsightly scratches made by the grains of sand being tossed about by the wind.

Josh: Geez. So we're stuck here? You mean there's no way back?

Kyle: It doesn't look like it.

Samuel: ...We came here looking for Orion and now we're stuck. In this desert.

The three of them sat there as the sand continued to swirl around and around. A faint beeping noise rang out amidst the wails of the wind. It was Joshua's communicator.

Joshua: Hey guys, i got a message coming in.

Joshua flipped open the clamshell device and a blurry message was shown on the screen. It was the leader of the Guardian team. Bruce Granger.

Bruce: Joshua, we are terribly sorry. We can't get to you. Orion has created some sort of sandstorm within the whole desert. We fear that there isn't a way out, much less a way in. His minions are circling the desert in extremely large numbers, and are heading straight in your direction. The three of you won't stand a chance....At this point, i don't know what to say...except...may God be with you at this moment. (Screen fuses out)

The three of them stood silent for a minute or two. Joshua swayed on the spot. He dropped his saber and fell to his knees beside it.

Josh: How can this be the end?

He raked the sandy ground with his bruised hands and scattered the sand in front of him.

Josh: We're just going to die like this?

He turned to Samuel and Kyle, hoping that at least they would have some hopeful words to share with him But Samuel just sat on the ground with his chin on his fist as Kyle stood up with his head down.

Samuel: I knew we'd die young. But i didn't think it'd be this early.

Kyle: What a way to go. I guess this is the price to pay for living an exciting life.

Just then, a battle horn sounded in the distance. It was faint, but clear. It was the same sound they had heard earlier before those suits of black armor attacked them. Thunderous clangs of metal on metal could be heard as well along with the rumbling of the ground as the minions drew closer.

Kyle: They'll be here soon.

Joshua: (Brings himself to his feet) Wouldn't it be better if we all just lay down? We don't even stand a chance. Theres probably thousands of them out there...

Samuel: I guess that would be one way of dying today. But there are many more favourable options.

The rumbling became heavier and louder as Kyle tightened his grip around the handle of his sword.

Joshua: You know, I can remember how the sunlight felt on my back after school ended on fridays. How we would run all the way from the gates to Staple field..Or how we'd all leap for joy when the recess bell rings. How the food at the canteen tastes....But now, we're all the way in some distant land about to meet our demise. Never too see those things again. We're so far away from that..

Samuel: Remember how we used to run around Fujiwara mall everytime we had to stay back in school? (Laughs) Or how we'd just sit on the grass in the school field, all of us, and watch the clouds take shape on that blue background.

Kyle: I miss our friends. I miss Nydia...I miss her green eyes, her smile, her indomitable spirit....her touch...

Joshua: I miss Kate...i miss the way she'd tell me that everything would be fine. I miss the way she made everything seem so right...

Samuel: ....I guess...I miss Tami as well. Her simplicity, the way she makes the world seem so easy to understand...the way she is so different from the way I am...

They were silent again. The noises grew louder. The wailing of the wind, the battle horns, the sound of metallic clangs and the rumbling marching of the minions. It all seemed too much to take it at once. But it all appeared to fade out into the background as Kyle said something that made the two of them flinch.

Kyle: I'm not laying down today.

Joshua: What?

Kyle: I'm not just going to sit here and die like a fish in a barrel.

Samuel: Hmm....

Joshua: What are you going to do then?

Kyle: I'm going to go out there and fight!

Samuel: There are thousands of them Kyle...

Kyle: Since when did numbers ever mean anything.

Joshua: When there are a thousand swords to one.

Kyle: It doesn't matter right now. What have we got to lose? We sit here, we die and never get to see tomorrow, we fight, we at least get a shadow of a chance.

Samuel: He's right Joshua. No matter how foolish it is too charge against a few thousand well armed soldiers.

Joshua: But...

Kyle: My Grandfather told me something once. A knight that rides into battle against a horde of dragons may not survive. But when he takes up the courage to take those steps to face his doom, he is a king for that moment.

Samuel: Inspiring..

Joshua shook his head and looked away for a second. He looked back at Kyle and Samuel's faces. They were not the faces of hopelessness but the faces of determination and readiness. His fear and distress released their hold on him for at least that moment as he picked up his saber and smiled at the two of them.

Joshua: If we die, it'll be an honor to die alongside the two of you.

Kyle: Come now (Pats Joshua on the shoulder) Let us take our stand.

Samuel: (Unsheathes his katana) Kings for a moment....I'll take that.

The three gripped their swords tightly and nodded to each other. This was their stand against the odds. They bounded straight into the dusty abyss with their cloaks shielding them from the onslaught of the sand grains. And as the wind wailed and the battle horns blasted, the three figures dissapeared into the blurry beyond, to fight once again....

A snippet from "End of days" from the pages of the unfinished series, "Youngbloods"


-Kyle

Forever never lasts

....Geoff climbed up onto the back of what used to be a pickup truck next to a shed in the field about a block away from the stadium. The concert was still going on and the music was so loud that the wild twangs of the guitars and beats of the drums could be heard all the way in the field. With a loud metallic thud, he fell back into the flatbed. Gazing up at the starless sky, into the black beyond. He didn't know whether he was angry or sad. Distraught or infuriated. He just lay there with his eyes wide open. Trying to suppress what may have entered his brain at that moment. His body flinched faintly as he heard a husky but familiar voice.

Voice: You look like you could use a drink.

Geoff lifted his body slightly. Kyle was sitting on a tree stump at the foot of the truck. In his hands were 2 cans of soda.

Geoff: Yo.

Without another word, he slumped back down onto the metal surface with a thud even louder than the first.

Kyle: Well here's your soda. Catch. (Throws the can into the flatbed)

Another loud thud echoed throughout the field followed by a short fizzing sound which undoubtedly came from the can of soda.

Kyle: Well thats one way to waste a dollar.

Geoff: It's still good...why aren't you at the concert?

Kyle: Everyone had to go home and "study". And besides, you left in such a hurry. I knew something was up.

He picked up the can which was half empty by now and propped himself up against the back window of the truck. Wiping his mouth on his nylon jacket after a long sip, he began to drum his fingers eratically on the side of the door.

Kyle: So are you going to sit there and lose your mind or are you going to tell me whats wrong?

Geoff: Either way, it wouldn't make much of a difference....but i could give you the drift of things.

He took another sip of the gassy orange soda and he set the can down beside him.

Geoff: Jeanette was her name...We were childhood friends. Best friends for most of our lives. Nothing more nothing less...

Kyle: Jeanette Lockwood?

Geoff: Yeah...We were close...

Kyle: I see.

Geoff: Somehow I don't think you do.

Kyle: Why not? I've lost friends along the way too.

Geoff: Well she wasn't just any friend alright!

Kyle: ...

Geoff: We grew up together Kyle. We ran through this field almost every other day picking up forget me nots when we were kids. We helped each other tie our shoelaces when they came loose. We used to tell each other how we wanted the future to be. But now I see that we have gone further from that than we've ever been. She left for America when we were 10. Friends forever she said. Friends forever...I still remember grasping her hand and feeling that promise. And now, she's leaving for a second time.

Kyle: She's leaving Japan?

Geoff: No, she's walking away from that promise. That pact that we made right here in this truck 6 years ago.

Kyle: She's still at the stadium man. You ought to straighten things out there.

Geoff: I've already said what i had to say. And I can't do anything more.

Kyle: I see...

Geoff: Right now, I wish I could go back in time and replay my life so that I would have never met her. Just to save the painful memory. But another part of me wants to see her smiling face glint in the summer sun as the soft breeze tossed her black hair back and forth. It's like grasping a rose. Its beautiful and it smells better than any perfume in the world. But it hurts just to hold it in the palm of your hand.

Kyle: To tell you the truth, I know a little of how that feels.

Geoff: You may...but tell me Kyle, why is it that enemies can live as enemies for eternity but friends come and go like dust in the wind. Why is it so ironic?

Kyle: I don't know Geoff. I've asked myself that a couple of times as well.

Geoff: Forget about life insurance and home insurance. What this world needs is friendship insurance.

Kyle remained silent but Geoff knew that he was agreeing silently by the slight nods he gave. The two of them didn't say anything for a while as the guitars wailed in the distance.

Kyle: Not all friendships go away like dust.

Geoff: I find that hard to believe.

Kyle: I can't prove it myself either, but i'd like to trust that we'd be friends for a long time to come. The group of us.

Geoff: It's been 2 years since we've all been friends.

Kyle: Yeah. And I don't see it going anywhere awry for now.

Geoff tilted his head up to the sky as a couple of stars appeared from behind the jet black clouds.

Geoff: Perhaps you're right Kyle. Maybe there is a fabled tale of friends who never gave up on one another. But for now, I'm not going to believe in that.

Kyle: It's never easy to believe in something that seems so impossible.

Geoff: I guess. Just remember. If anyone ever says forever, ask them if they're even capable of lasting 6 years. Even 75 years isn't forever. Forever never ends. And in this world Kyle, forever never lasts...

Kyle: Hear, hear.

Geoff hung his head low for a second as a teardrop fell into his empty can of soda. He quickly rubbed his eyes with the sleeve of his jacket and took a deep breath.

Geoff: This is going to hurt for a while. Quite a while.

Kyle: You'll feel better soon. Don't worry.

Geoff: Thats just 12 years gone. No biggie.

He stood up and jumped off the flatbed and onto the grass below. Kyle gave him a pat on the back as they walked in the direction of the carpark.

Kyle: I probably will die before I'm 35 so i won't get the chance to experience this forever anyway.

Geoff: Neither, I'll be dead at 29.

Kyle: You know what, we joke too much about our deaths.

Geoff: (Laughs scarcely) Well whatever it is, I'm glad your my friend right now. Because I'm going to have to borrow bus fair from you. I'm broke..

Kyle:....Thats terrible man.

As the two of them walked off into the chill of the night, the stadium erupted with applause as the concert came to an end. It marked the end of a performance and the beginning of a new one. And that applied to Geoff and the other's lives very much.

I've never quite understood Geoff. Even in times of crisis he always seemed to be able to shine rays of cheeriness through his internal darkness. That's something i've never been able to do. I respect him alot for that. That night, he lost one of his dearest friends but he still had us to fall back on. After all, that was one of the Youngblood's mottos. If anyone should fall, be there to catch them.


(Forever never lasts-a snippet from the unfinished series, "Youngbloods")
-Kyle

An excerpt from the pages of "Youngbloods"

....The two of them stared at each other dead in the eye as they circled the ring. The anger, hatred, jealousy and tension between these two had built up over the weeks and was now concentrated in between these two teenaged athletes. Kyle clenched his fists leaving his fingernail marks deeply embedded in the palms of his hands. Geoff returned a stare as cold as ice through his fringe which shadowed the look of fury in his face. The two of them came to a stop directly opposite from one another in the ring. Geoff dropped his head as Kyle raised his.
"Hajime!" cried the referee as he swung his hand down in a precise chopping motion hopping backwards to remain out of the danger area. The timekeeper gave the bell a solid ring and as the first sound waves echoed throughout the arena, the two collided in the center of the 20 foot by 20 foot ring. They came together with great momentum. If a scientist was around, he would have speculated that planets would be formed in that big bang. This was it. In that tie-up, all the months of conflict these two had had was going to be settled. And the last man standing would have nothing more than his pride to keep. They locked arms, pressing each other back and forth. It was Geoff with his extreme style, athletic skill and trickery against Kyle with his raw power and strength. This was most definitely, the clash of the titans. With a swing of his arms, Kyle quickly overpowered Geoff and flung him across the mat into the turnbuckle. The crowd roared thunderously as he stood there, still with that look on his face staring at Geoff in the corner. Geoff ran at full speed toward him and they tied up once more. This time, Geoff followed through with a swift go-behind, clubbing Kyle on the back of his neck and pushing him into the turnbuckle. The cheers were deafening as Geoff flashed his third finger to Kyle who was looking on from the corner. Kyle pulled himself up and walked up to his slightly shorter opponent. They were face to face in the center of the ring again. Each of them gave a sheepish nod as they fixed their eyes on one another. Once more the stadium was filled with ruckus as the two of them stood there. These two superb athletes hated each other. But beneath their faces, they held a great deal of respect for one another.... (The immovable object and the irresistable force -Youngbloods)


A little snippet of the unfinished series, Youngbloods. A tale of love, hate, sport, trust, friendship and the everyday life of a bunch of unusual teens- By Kyle Ganapathy



Take care and if all goes well, you'll be reading more of this. Unless you don't want to of course.
-Kyle

Ramblin

As I walked over the water with a bunch of silver coins in my pocket, I looked up to the sky and saw an areoplane pass by. But when I took a closer look, it wasn't a plane but a space battlecruiser. So with a deep breath I exclaimed "Beam me up scotty!".
Suddenly, I found myself on the bridge of the cruiser and I whipped out a phaser. "I'm taking control of this ship now" I said. The crew looked on in plaint horror as they said , "Sir, this isn't a ship, it's a McDonald's outlet." So I looked all around me and I saw red and yellow. A clown stood there with a big red afro. I said, "Hey aren't you that guy Ronal-"
"Shh! Shut up! Do you wanna get sued? My name is Roald McDougal" he interrupted.
"No, no I'm sure it was Ronald Mcdonald." I replied
Suddenly a big black van pulled up to the place with three guys in white moving at a really quick pace. "I'm here on behalf of the King of the world" He said "And you are gonna see him in court!" With that, they dragged the odd clown off and I went out to bid him farewell.
"Now what?" I thought to myself. "Hey! Time to get a new car!"
So i set off south to the used car shop. With my silver coins jingling in my extremely loose pocket. "Yo ho!"said the salesman, "What can I do for you?"
I said, "Gimme a love bug in a cabriolet style."
And he said, "Sure why not? It only costs a nickel!"
I sat down in the driver seat with my hand on the clutch and within 3 seconds I was out of the place. I took a time warp into california where the girls were oh so fine. "Hey!" they said as I drove by in my bug, "Can we get a ride with you?" Thinking quick i said
"Sure what the heck put your stuff in the hood"
The sky was gold! We were cruisin down the road. To the beach we were going
Walking through the sand with the sun juice flowing.
We swam in the sea, we surfed and played volleyball
A day at the beach with, "I wish they all could be california girls!"
So I had to go around 5 or 6. I turned around and said bye to the chicks.
"Bye Kyle!" They said as I sped away
Driving in my love bug flying down the free way.
I still had some silver coins left over and I was bored.
So I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow. And as I sat upon the pot of gold, eating the chocolate coins, I watched the stars crash into the sea with fires of a thousand suns.
Sitting there with the 7 colours on my back and a spectrum of light on my front. A cluster blinking lights climbed into the night.
Taking my chance once again I said, "Beam me up Scotty!"
And in the timeframe of a millionth of a second I was on a battle cruiser with Lorenzo Lamas, Antonio Banderas and Enrique Iglesias.
They all said, "Yo! We’re the mexicools!"
And I said, "Now that’s cool! So where are we heading?"
Enrique turned around and gave me a stare like a cow gives an oncoming train and said, "To the Andromeda galaxy!"
"Whoa!" I said, "Ain’t that a little far?"
Lorenzo said, "No, not really, it’s just past that star."
So we weaved through the asteroid fields and escaped from the black holes as we laughed at the beams of light which couldn’t.
We were travelling 5 times the speed of smell. So my nose was blocked and I couldn’t really tell.
Into Elicoor 3 we went as we unleashed our lightsabers upon the land.
"Give us all your gold and silver lest you die!" said Antonio.
"Hey look! It’s darth vader!" Enrique exclaimed as he pulled out a blaster.
He breathed like he had asthma and walked like a terribly maintained machine.
"Kyle! Join the darkside and together, we can form the biggest fast food chain in the world!" he said through his irritating pants and wheezes.
Not wanting to work as a fry cook, I shot him fifteen times in the chest and threw my lightsaber through his face. "Well, that takes care of him doesn’t it?"
We got back on our space ship with our bags of gold and we drank wine and whiskey though the bottles were kinda old.
Enrique said "Hey Kyle, thanks for going with the flow"
And at that moment, it was time for me to go.
He beamed me down into my Love bug at the end of the rainbow.
But by this time, it was night and the 7 colours were no more.
"What now?" I said as I looked at my watch "Holy crap! It’s Wednesday! I’m supposed to be at the esplanade!"
So I turned on the rocket boosters and zoomed across the water.
Through the ceiling of the esplanade I drove, injuring at least 200 people.
Well they confiscated my car, it’s on display at the esplanade. A volkswagen beetle which they painted extremely badly.
I walked down to the muffin shop and bought some silver coins with the silver coins I had left and the store owner said, "Sir, are you crazy?"
And I said, "Man I am tonight!"
I forgot the location of where we were supposed to study, so I gave an earth shattering cry, "Where the hell are you guys?!?!?!?"
Rishic came out first and kicked me in the chest.
Jasvir gave me a piledriver that put my skull to the test.
Selvam came out and german suplexed me,
Then Dewei delivered, a front-face DDT.
"STOP SHOUTING!" they yelled as I lay on the floor.
I was a bloody mess by then. But I could’ve taken more.
"Where have you been?" Ying asked
"Well, I took a trip to McDonald’s, bought a volkswagen beetle with silver coins, see that one outside? Then I went to california and had some fun on the beach with some hot girls, then I went to the end of the rainbow and made wishes on 736 shooting stars, oh yeah, I at some chocolate coins too. And after that, I went into outer space with a bunch of Hispanic actors, killed darth vader, robbed elicoor 3, went back to the end of the rainbow, took my car to the esplanade, crashed through the window, see the car outside? I had the snot beaten out of me by you guys and now I’m sitting here and telling you how I came here. And I told you that I took a trip to McDonald’s, bought a volkswagen beetle-
"Enough!" She said as she zipped up my lips, "Let’s go and study already!"
So we went to a corner and we pored over our books. And right there, as I read through physics, I came up with a working theory of cold fusion. "Eureka!" I said "I’ve done what Einstein couldn’t do! I’ve just created the cold fusion engine."
Suddenly, a time portal opened up and Lorenzo Lamas popped out. "Yoink!" He said as he snatched the theory from my fingers. "I need this more than you do"
"You’re just gonna let him take that Kyle" Nadia said
"Why not? I was just kidding about the whole thing anyway"
They all looked at me with narrowed eyes and within 3 seconds, they took me by the scruff of my neck and flung me out of the Esplanade, "And stay out!" They exclaimed in unison as I walked down the stairs.
When I turned around, I saw the headlights of a car , "AAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHGHHHHHHH" I screamed as it ran me over.
And suddenly, I found myself, in my bed.
"Wait a second, that was all a dream?"
I looked at my watch and it said "Thursday"
Just the, Enrique appeared through the same time portal, "Hey Kyle, You got any mustard? We don’t have any left on board. The yellow kind if possible, I find the brown kind too gritty."
I looked at him with a look of disbelief and said, "Would you like fries with that?"
Well that’s the end of my chronicle. Enrique got his mustard and we all lived happily ever after. Well except for Darth vader coz he uhh…died? And Ronald McDonald who was facing 13 Life sentences. I went back to visit the girls from california and we went a surfin USA! My love bug is still at the esplanade till today. You can see it on display near the waterfront. Our big group of friends? Or should I say the lalaians or lalagnese or whatever you wanna call em, we’re just a thick as thieves as before. Is that the right simile. Wait, is that even a simile? Well how am I supposed to know? I don’t even take literature. That lousy principal of mine. I oughta punch you in the nose. Just kidding. Well This ends the super crazy ramblings of Kyle’s crazy mind. Be sure to stay tuned for the next installment which will be around soon. Take care peace love soul hope freedom care friendship trust faith luck bliss passion determination and all that other thingys that sound good to say in a farewell message. Have a nice day. And in case I don'’ see you, Have a nice life! (:

-Kyle

A tear in my flair

Theres a tear in my flair but I'm not really in despair
I only wish that you were here to love and to care
The feeling that i get, so uncommon, so rare.
But I know it cannot happen, it won't ever be true.
And I don't think I should sit here daydreaming and feeling blue.
After all, you'll always be my friend. The one and only you.
My wing may be torn but i'll soon be airborne.
I may be a little hurt but i haven't hit the dirt.
Just sitting here with memories of an atomic lullaby
i lay on the grass gazing at the sky as it goes by. I'd love to fly.
I don't want to cry.
I won't
I'd rather die.
I'll much rather be drinking whisky and rhye.
The clouds go past as i remain on the grass.
It's been many months since i've gone to a mass.
Well, My wing will take sometime to heal.
In the meantime I'd like to say that wrestling is real!
Well sometimes i guess but not all the time.
I'm running out of things that sound the same and rhyme. I guess I better go
Before my fingers explode.
I've been typing non stop since the i changed my desktop mode.
I'll fly again soon don't worry about me.
I'll alive and well, and hey! I'm Kyle G!

An Odd Day Indeed

Alright, I think I tore my pants for 17th time today. I'm serious. I lost count really. When I signed my name to borrow the school's pants, i turned the pages and found my name a couple of times. Dating back to early 2003. Cool. Hahaha. Well it wasn't that bad i guess. they had a fitting pair. Oh yeah, our team came in 2nd for the interdisciplinary quiz today. Geez I got all the geo related questions wrong! Only one correct. Pfft. They asked weird questions and I had no idea what to respond with, i said India like twice. And apparently Mother Theresa isn't from India. Okay I made an ass out of myself. But we had fun doing it anyway. Patrician Idol results should be out by friday. Don't know if I got in. But i didn't really feel like i was doing a good job on stage. Well, we'll see. We're gonna have to do our SYF play in front of the whole school on monday. And my extremely creative punishment which Mr. Gill came up with for not doing my SBQ's is to sing Count on me Singapore on monday in front of the school as well. Quite a predicament I'm in now aren't I? Oh well. I'll find a way to get through this. Just like i always do. A king of the ring needs to show his might sometimes y'know? Heheh. Okay today during Bio i was totally drained of energy. Couldn't even walk straight. Amazingly, Josh and I didn't injure each other today. Though we smacked each other a few times. Today I went to say hi to Damian and after shaking his hand, he pushed me aside and yelled, "Die! Die! You son of a ****" and started trampling on this cockroach that was minding it's own business next to my foot. Well thats Damian. Last year he killed a hornet by throwing his E math book on it. He also killed many other cockroaches. Hahaha. Good ol' Damian. Uhh...terribly sorry bout killing the cockroaches though. But................yeah. Well anyway I gotta go. Either my house is on fire, or we're gonna have to eat maggi mee today. *Sniffs the air Have a nice day!




- Kyle

Flair

I think somehow and someway, my fighting spirit has climbed out of my gastric pits and back into my heart. I feel that flair i had last year. Its as if some miracle happened. Kinda weird for it to change so drastically though. This can only mean good things. I don't really think a bad thing has come out from determination before. well except for a twisted mad scientist who was determined to take over and destroy the world. Maybe thats the only kinda bad thing i can think about. Well it's time for me to hang up my sorrow and step back into school everyday and jump down the stairs, handstand on the tables, run up the walls and do what i do best. Make everyone feel my energy.




-Kyle

The river of life

As his small raft floats down the creek, he passes the rocks and trees he had seen many times before. It seems like he has known this place all his life. This place was known as down the creek clearing, a place that someone went to everytime he lost control of his raft. As he approaches the utmost end of the clear sparkling water, he notices two familiar faces.

Kyle: (Sitting on his raft) Do I know those two guys?

He paddled further down the stream with his hands.

White haired man: Kyle? What are you doing here this time of year?

Man in a white robe: Haven't seen you in a while. What brings you down here this time?

Kyle: Oh its you guys. Hope and Faith. Nice to see you guys again. I'm sure you already know by now.

Faith: Yes but I was just checking.

Kyle: I don't think I'll be here very long though. My friends are waiting upstream for me. I hope.

Hope: You called?

Kyle: I said I hope my friends are waiting for me.

Hope: Well of course they are. Just ask Faith

Faith: That's right. You're must have faith in your friends Kyle. No matter how rocky the road has been recently, you must believe that friendship can't be destroyed that easily.

Kyle: I...

Hope: Yes, yes, you hope everything will be the same as before. What do you think I'm here for.

Kyle: I just don't want anything to change.

Faith: Well then it's up to you to keep it that way.

Kyle: I know, I know. Hey, how come Despondance and Regret aren't around?

Hope: Apparently they decided to sit this episode out.

Faith: You don't feel them do you Kyle?

Kyle: Surprisingly not much. A little bit of regret, thats all.

Hope:(pats Kyle on the back) Don't be flustered my friend. Everything will be alright in the end.

Kyle: And if it's not?

Faith: Well then it's not the end. Remember that Kyle. Thats what keeps us alive in you.

The sun filtered through the trees and gave the water a reflective quality to it.

Kyle: (Looks into his reflection) Geez is that how I always look?

Faith: It's how you choose to look.

Kyle: I don't get it

Hope: When was the last time you smiled a true smile?

Kyle: Recently? But why do I have this look of loss on my face.

Faith: Because you always think that you're gonna lose.

Hope: He's right. For goodness sake cheer up sometimes! You think too much and that's what provokes those feelings.

Faith: You always prepare for the worst possible outcome. Why don't you try aiming for the best?

Hope: Yes, just look at us, Hope and Faith are of such minute amount in you that we're getting white hair already. And we're the same age as you!

Kyle: Oh...I'm really sorry.

Hope: Don't be sorry. Just give us more time and we'll gain back our past strength like before.

Kyle: So if I'm not such a pessimistic bum, you guys won't be old and frail?

Faith: Precisely!

Kyle: Great!

Hope: You're still young Kyle. But you act as if you' e having a midlife crisis.

Faith: Go out and be a teenager. While you still can.

Kyle: I'm planning to do that. Just need a little rest is all.

Hope: Your self induced sadness has really hindered your creativity.

Faith: (Holds up a stack of paper) Remember these poems and stories?

Kyle: (Takes them from his hand) Number 6, Raedric Moon, War of the schools, The Barpanti's order, Rosewater. These are all the pieces I wrote a while ago.

Faith: Yes. Some are left unfinished.

Kyle: I know

Hope: And it's because of your own crazy mind that these pieces will never make it past your computer.

Kyle: You're right...Maybe I need to stop dwelling in the pits of Despondance.

Faith: You'd better stop. He could sue you for tresspassing.

Kyle: Hahaha.

Hope: Put aside all this "F*** the world" and "Nobody cares for me anymore" stuff and become the Kyle that everyone loves. You're not meant to tag up with depression. You're a boy of passion, faith and hope.

Kyle: That's right! I am! Oh by the way, where is passion?

Faith: Uhh...she kinda got stuck on the emotion Highway. But she should be by to guide you later upstream.

Kyle: Thats great to hear.

Hope: Now, tell us that you're not going to live the life of a suicidal. Tell us that you're going to be the Kyle we knew before!

Kyle: (Hits his chest) I will not any longer be plagued by my internal hurt. I shall not dwell in self regret. I cannot spoil my friend's attitudes just because mine sucks! I am Kyle Andrew Ganapathy and from now on, I'm going to make things right.

Faith: (To Hope) It's good to seem him like this ain't it.

Hope: He's beginning the revival of his indomitable spirit.

Kyle: (Tears off the bandage around his heart and wipes off the FTW on his arm) The sun is shining. That's odd. Usually when I'm here, it rains.

Hope: It can only mean good things. The sun will lead you to your friends.

Faith: It was a sad sight last year when we almost lost you to Depression and Despondance. They would have ultimately lead you to Death.

Kyle: Well that's not gonna happen anymore. Not with my friends alongside me and with you guys, I'm gonna be unbreakable.

Hope: That's what we hope.

Faith:Well its a nice sunny day here. And that is very rare. How bout a spot of tea?

Kyle: Can't do that my man, I have to go.

Faith:What? So soon? Aren't you gonna wait for Passion?

Kyle: She'll catch up, she's a fast paddler.

Hope: So you're leaving now?

Kyle: (Starts paddling off) Yeah why not? My friends are probably looking for me.

Faith: Hey wait! Remember Kyle, The game that can't be won, can't be played.

Kyle: I know Faith! You've told me that many times. Thanks alot!

Hope: Hey Kyle!

Kyle: Yeah?

Hope: You'll need this. (Throws him a wooden oar)

Kyle:(Catches it) Thanks. I'll never forget you guys.

The sun continued to shine majestically in the morning sky as Kyle paddled up the river. Before long, he was out of sight.

Hope: He'll be back some day.

Faith: Not for a very long time though. Tea for you my good man?

Hope: Certainly.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kyle: (Paddling) I'm coming back. Back to you my friends. No more depression. No more sadness. No more of these sinful things. I'm coming. Please say you'll be waiting for me. Please tell me that everything will be the same. Please be there. Please?

The weekend has arrived

Well it's about freakin time the weekend got here. I think I got cut several times this week. First was when I was carving some wood and got at least 3 cuts on my left hand. Then at KFC when we were studying, a mechanical pencil jabbed me. Then at DnT the same day, a screwdriver and a hacksaw left two more marks on my left. And today, when Joshua and I were punching each other, his fingernail tore off some skin on two fingers of my right hand. Can't I go through a day without getting injured in some way? Before that, both me and Josh kept getting splinters when we fought with sticks. Oh well. Just finished tuition a while ago. I seem to be improving in maths. Well hopefully. Still as bad as ever in application. But hey, you can't change a guys IQ can you? And so as usual, I'm stuck with nothing to say...Lemme see if I missed out any points. Uhhh...well we played soccer for a bit today. Shawn Spruyt scored a goal from a goalkick. Now thats cool. Hmm...oh and today as usual, Josh and I were sumo style wrestling throughout the free periods. We both fell on a chair. Thanks alot Josh. But it's always fun to have such a lively class. As expected, we sang happy birthday to the relief teacher. It's become like a tradition. It's a funny moment when everyone claps their hands and sings along. Reminds me of my childhood days. Our class is totally whacked. Can you imagine 16 year olds anywhere else doing the same things we are doing? I mean today during CLB, Joshua was chasing me around the class before the lesson began. I jumped onto the teacher's table and it was already flimsy. It started to creak and stuff so Josh said, "Kyle get off you'll fall!" So i got off and was greeted by a fresh punch from him. Talk about care and concern. And like yesterday when Russel was holding the Hydrochloric acid bottle by the cap. Samuel told him, "Russel, put it down it's gonna fall." And 3 seconds later, guess what happened? The bottle broke in half and there was acid everywhere. Sujinder was setting fire to the methyl orange and Joshua was putting zinc on his burning splint. Everyone probably forgot what the lesson was in the first place. Childish cannot describe us either. Darren was sleeping coz he was sick and wanted to keep the back door open for some air. But David kept closing it everytime he pushed it open. So finally he decided to get up and push it all the way to the magnetic catch. Then David stuck his hands in between the hinges trying to make it budge but was obviously unsuccessful. And eventually he got up off his chair during a lesson and walked out of class just to close the door again. Geez. Wei Jie just adds to our craziness. Today we were supposed to read something out of our English 5 year series but it was a free period. Wei Jie didn't bring his book so he walked over to Samuel and asked, "Can I borrow your 10 year series?" and Samuel replied, "I don't have one" He walked away and stood still for a second. Then it hit him and he came back, "Can I borrow your 5 year series." At this point, Samuel was clearly listening to his Ipod and sitting in an aisleway, not doing any work . So he said, " No i'm using it." Then Wei Jie said "Okay." and walked back to his place. God. He's sometimes blur beyond my comprehension. When he was walking back, Shane kept saying ,"F****er" in a voice that mocked Sujinder's. I think he said it like 12 times maybe? Wow theres alot to write about my class. Well that's at least one part of my life that's interesting. Well, I pretty much covered the unbleak stuff that happened this week. And to say the least, my coverage sucks. Oh well. Hope this thing doesn't have a word limit or anything. Have a nice day.


-Kyle

The first broadcast

The other blog brought back too many bad memories. Didn't wanna have to go through the trouble of reading every single post as i deleted them so I just cut it off at the source. Guess it's easier that way. I'm sure all of you were sick of my depressing layout and music anyway. So was I. Didn't need something to remind me that i was feeling depressed. Well, i guess this skin is alot more neutral. Still has my lame essence rubbing off on it. The chatterbox is up too. Got a new colour to it. Slate if I'm not wrong. There have been multitudes of changes since the last time I wrote. Can't cover them all here though. That's okay. You don't really want to hear stories from the book of Kyle's boring school days. I guess the school has become alot more like a college campus because everyone stays back until at least 6 nowadays. You won't walk far without seeing a familiar face. I like this atmosphere. Today I left class early and took a long gaze throught the gap in between the science block and the canal. The sky was blue and the sun hit the white walls giving it a warm bright look. I knew this would be one of the last chances I get to appreciate this school before I myself become an ex-Patrician. Ex is such a depressing word. I hate it. I wish these days would never end. But before we know it, we'll be 18 and in the army. And after that we'll be working. And then maybe we'll have kids of our own who will complain of the same things. I don't know what the future holds anymore. But I do know that I don't want to be the type of middle aged man who gives young people the creeps or has the physique of a beer guzzler. To be honest I'd rather be in Japan having my head raked by a cheese grater. And that's probably where i'll be headed. If we ever part, I know I'm going to do my best to keep in touch with all of you whom I shared my school life with. I'll even send you front row tickets to my matches if you wanna come. Haha. If I leave, not a day will go by without me thinking, "I wonder how Samuel is doing" , "What could Joshua be working as?", "Has Nadia decided what she's gonna be?" or even "Is Wei Jie still as blur as he was 6 years ago?". I don't think i'll ever forget any of my good friends from this day till the day i pass on. Which will probably be somewhere along the lines of 2100. Hopefully...Well sorry for boring you too much but it's just me on one of my wild thinking courses. It happens alot. Maybe all our lives will split in the center and join up somewhere back down the road. That would be nice. Really. We can only hope though. I'm not worried about the future anymore. But I'm still a little scared of it.



-Kyle